Onwards and Upwards

Thoughts from Ports and Planes of the Air Variety

Part 1: Pre-Journey

So here I am. Waiting at the airport. Just waiting. The worst part and also the best. I am a rather anxious person and I hate sitting, just sitting, at the gate, waiting for what comes next. Yet, at the same time, I also find waiting at the terminal relaxing in a way. Perhaps I’m just exhausted, but I’ve always found that there’s something about passing through security, the absolute focus and presence of mind required, that induces a calm.

I’ve found a place near the wall of windows, watching luggage being loaded onto the plane and the distant rise and fall of planes in the distance. Their tails seem like shiny sails on the horizon of the opposite facing terminal as they taxi. 

***

I’m sitting here now, taking a quick breather before I go and gather some supplies for  the flight. Seeing as I’ll be landing in Amsterdam at 6:30 am local time (or 11:30 pm CST), I feel as though I should procure some breakfast now (who knows how long my layover will take!). Now, I haven’t flown internationally since I was a small child, so I had no recollection of the O’Hare international terminal, but let me tell you, it is fancy! All the shops here are high end, and I don’t just me “for an airport”, I mean it rivals Rodeo Drive. I’m talking diamond stores, a Chanel boutique, free standing Michael Kors and Gucci stores, and everything in between. It makes sense, I suppose, since everything here is tax and duty free, but some of these stores I’ve never seen before in my life, and here they are, at the airport of all places! It is strange though, some of these designer stores are selling clothing. Do people actually go shopping in these stores, try on clothing and then pack it in their luggage to get on the plane? That feels excessive, and yet slightly glamorous.

***

Wow, even the coffee shops are fancy in this terminal! I’m talking Italian roasts and beautiful little gems of pastries, not just a step or two up from Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts. The place is spelled “kōfê” that’s how fancy it is.”

***

The biggest thing I’m thinking about right now as I stare out on the Tarmac while doing purposeful, calming breathing to stave off nerves (or attempt to at least), is just how real this all it. This morning, even though I was packed and checked in, I still work up like a normal day and watched TV with my dog. Then, in a matter of a few hours, I’m facing the big wide world. It’s a realization that hit me like a concrete wall, suddenly there with an unmatched impact. I feel as though I’m in a Magritte painting, standing in my family room at home, but when I turn around, the fourth wall lead to Leeds, to something so big and unknown that I can’t even imagine it in the frame yet!

I’m sitting here, receiving an influx of well wishing texts, and I’m asking myself, am I ready? I’m holding on for dear life to all the “good luck” people are sending me, trying to grasp what I’m getting myself into and realizing that, ready or not, I’m on my way!

***

Part 2: Over the Ocean

So, I’m on the plane, and man is it cramped in economy. I always forget how much more cramped international long-haul flights are compared to smaller city hopper planes. I mean, I’m sitting here and my knees are touching the seat in front of me. I was barely apple to shove my backpack under the seat in front of me! Sure, they provide you with a little pillow and blanket, but my legs are cramping already. It’s gonna be a long 7 hours. 

But then again, I have spent 28 hours on a train before with just snacks, and no bathroom amenities available. It was rough, but I did it. I was able to sleep and I didn’t die. It wasn’t “all right” by any standards, but it wasn’t the worst thing I’ve ever done in my life. So if I could do that, then this flight will be a piece of cake. 

***

I always forget just how noisy the interior of airplanes are. I have this mental image of lulling silence, perhaps just the whisper of cutting through the clouds. But then, I sit down and the air pumping through is deafening and the gravely sound of the captain’s announcement is always too loud or too quiet. 

I ended up listening to several episodes of This American Life, and found out that the Sprite on KLM tastes rather strange. Not unpalatable like diet soda, just bitter and off. Curious. 

***

I’ve decided that I really like KLM however. We got hot tea towels before dinner to freshen up. Nothing is more welcome in the chilly, dry, reconstituted air. Another plus, the girl next to me moved to a different seat, so now I have significantly more room! 

Dinner was a pleasant and satisfying surprise! Airplane food always seems to get a bad wrap and my only experience eating an actual meal mid air was when I went to the Philippines 11 years ago. We flew China Airlines and all I remember was that the eggs came with ketchup on them (yuck) and there was what I thought was Jello, but turned out to be salty gelatin with olives suspended in it (double yuck). When KLM brought out dinner, I received a warm and tasty veggie pasta, a small salad, a warm dinner roll, cheese and crackers, a small chilled bottle of water, and a yummy and heaping slice of carrot cake. It was a simple meal, yet somehow both aesthetically pleasing and delicious! Even the plastic silverware was nicely presented and of such a good quality that I briefly considered taking them with me (not a joke, I actually thought about it for longer than I should’ve). And the water bottle was so cute A convenient size and it had silhouettes of bicycles and wooden clogs (so Dutch) on the label! I feel so much better!

***

At home it would be 9:20 pm, and I’ve sleep in small doses for an hour or so, but there is a group of old women behind me who have been cackling and hitting the back of my seat and pulling it backward (why though?) throughout the night, despite the fact that the cabin lights are off and it is deadly silent. 

It’s really hitting me though, sitting in the dark on this plane, that when I land in 2 hours, I’ll be in Europe, a completely different continent, for the first time. I’ll have lost 7 hours somewhere out there over the ocean. It’s astounding. I feel like I’m in one of those cartoons where the map scrunched up and all of a sudden you’re at your destination, or like Mrs. Whosit and Mrs. Whatsit just grabbed me by the hand and pulled me through a wrinkle. 

I think the biggest thing that I’ve come to realize is that, objectively, I know that the rest of the world is out there and I have mental images of several place, but to an extent all those places only exist in theory or in the abstract to me. They don’t become real until I have a physical understand of the place. 

***

Part 3: Austen in Europe

Holy cow I’m in Europe. 

I thought it would me more different. But it isn’t. Looking from the plane window, I wouldn’t be able to tell where we were aside from all the signs, which are in Dutch. There were trees and highways with cars and streetlights. I think that unsettled me more than if I had landed amongst gingerbread houses and stone castles. It actually reminds me a little bit of Midway, though less urban. 

***

I’m sitting in Amsterdam Schiphol at my “gate” and I’m fairly certain I’m going to have to take a shuttle onto the tarmac to board my connection. Interesting. How Casablanca. Also, shoutout to Willow, Vickey, and Ryan for the comforting voice messages I found waiting for me when I was able to turn my wifi back on! You guys are incredible and I miss you loads!

***

Yup, I was right about the plane. A good pay off though since this short distance plane was much roomier than the long haul plane. 

The last real and truly stressful hurdle that I have to face now is immigration. I deeply regret not applying for my visa ahead of time no matter how much of a nuisance it seemed then. It would’ve given me so much more peace of mind now. But what’s done is done. I’m just hoping that they give me the correct visa stamp and don’t send me back to the US after 30 days (or immediately). Though, during my layover I ran through all of the scenarios that frighten me and none of them ends with me dying or homeless. So that’s a positive. It would be a set back, and I might honestly have a panic attack in the middle of the airport, but the Earth wouldn’t fall out of the sky and neither would I. 

***

While Schiphzl reminded me of Midway, Leeds Bradford reminds me of when I flew into Hartford, CT. So tiny, and in the middle of nowhere it seems. Surprising, really, considering how large Leeds is. 

But I got my visa without a hitch! Yeah, they let me! And I made it safe and sound to my room at Devonshire Hall! It’s a sweet little “flat” as they say, with a nice view of the courtyard. (There aren’t any screen on the windows, though, do I just let the bugs and birds fly inside?)